The Lies of Gestalt

"The whole is greater than the sum of its parts" has never resounded more untruly than now.

Taking on the reins of 2 "part-time" jobs in actually makes me feel busier than when I was doing a 5-day work week full-time. As much as I only have 2 "official" working days, I am hardly "free" or even considered "flexible."

In fact, when there are things such as 20 hour work-days, and to only play 1-hour in total over 4-days for a hardcore nut like me probably says more than enough.

Surely, few can understand the overheads, coordination and required brain-segmentation to work between 2 jobs, across 2 very different cognitive domains, and on 2 very different cycles. It's times like this when the cliche of "24 hours being not enough" has to be said.

A stark contrast from my perhaps-too-idle 4 months at the start of the year.

I sat and wondered which was actually worse, being too busy, or simply too free? Which is worse, aimlessly floating in the open sea or climbing an almost insurmountable mountain? In short, the former.

Days are not hard to pass in leisure floating out in the open, but such a lifestyle is perhaps more than detrimental in the long run, as you just get entertained to death; and before you know it, a month, a year, or even 10, has passed you by, and you have nothing much to put to your name.

In Ian Fleming words:

"In at least one religion, acedia is the first of the cardinal sins. So boredom, and particularly the incredible circumstance of waking up bored, was the only vice Bond utterly condemned."

So while I am busy to the point of suffocation these days, coming right out of the other extreme, I actually derive some sort of masochistic pleasure to know that my days are overly wrung, but always with the underlying though that at least I feel that I'm getting somewhere, doing something, and hopefully inching towards my longer-term goals.

Now, if only I could find the Beauty that is Moderation in my life.... guess she continues to elude me as always.